How to make it easy for your young children?

Recent lockdowns have brought a lot of changes in our lives, and one of them is the new order of schooling. Children have to adjust their lives around online classes, which is an unknown terrain for them. Their problems might look inconsequential to the adults, but to them, these problems posed by the sudden lockdown are important and are altering their lives as they know it.

They are exposed to many changes. Like their friends are far away, they cannot have private conversations with them. Teachers monitor them on the screen, and of course, hear every word they say. It is not easy to be obedient and pretend like you are listening to each and every word that is said during the class.

Some of the joys of childhood that we all remember were playing with friends, sharing secrets with them, exchanging notes with the bench partner while the teacher taught, sharing lunch, getting playtime and free period, etc. With the introduction of online classes, our kids are missing these little joys, especially the young ones in elementary schools.

It’s the phase when they discover themselves, make long-lasting friendships, learn new games, and silly pranks. It might appear like I am emphasizing non-essential aspects of education. However, many studies have explained the importance of affective or emotional learning. They found that it is an integral part of children’s growth. In their absence, the child can get stressed and upset.

You might never know because the young ones are not great at expressing themselves. They might shout, and create havoc in the house, but you wouldn’t always understand why they are doing so. Their emotions could be misplaced, so parents have to be alert and careful. Hopefully, the arrangement of online classes for elementary school kids is going to be temporary, until then you must try to make it easy for them.

What can you do?

As a parent, your role is crucial, and it needs to be as balanced as possible. You have to be mindful of where to step up and where to stop interfering while they are attending online classes. After all, it’s their classroom, maybe a virtual one, but still a classroom. It is not going to be easy since this whole thing is a new experience for you as well. But, you can make mistakes, talk to your children, and learn.

On asking a few kids in Grade 4 about their experience and their expectations from their parents, I received many interesting insights. Here is a list of some of those observations which you can use to strengthen your parenting arsenal.

Preparedness

Young children are not familiar with technology as much as their older peers. They need your support in setting up the system. Like being ready with the login name and password. Knowing at what time the class is going to start. They might need help in ensuring that the device is charged, and the camera and the microphone are working. The position of the device is well thought that and allows them to stretch, and be mindful of their posture.

Also, all the homework and assignments might come through you. So, don’t miss it. It might be overwhelming, so make a to-do list every day and hand it over to them. It gets embarrassing for them to say they have not done the homework in front of their peers and teachers. In a few days, they will eventually get tech-savvy. Then, they might not need your help, but until then support them as much as you can.

Give Space

Kids must be given both physical as well as mental space. With parents lingering around them, talking behind them, or walking across the room where they are sitting multiple numbers of times, children lose their focus. They get interested in what you are eating, watching, or cleaning. Interestingly, a child preferred typing his response during the classroom instead of speaking. When asked why, he said that “if I unmute the class, my classmates and teachers could hear my parents fighting.” Spare your child from such discomfort. It’s really hard for them to navigate between home and class in such a situation. So, either allocate them a silent space or postpone all the activities that are not urgent. Each class might last from thirty to forty-five minutes, so try not to disturb them during this time.

Don’t Micromanage

This is the most crucial point. Many parents end up micromanaging their children while they are attending online classes. One of the children interviewed said, “ I don’t feel comfortable speaking when my mom or dad is observing me. I don’t want them to hear what I say in the class”. Of course, this is true for any of us. Do you want to be scrutinized by your parents about how you talk with your friends? Children, like everyone, have different personalities.

A scholar named Althusser explained it using the story of “ Hey you, come here”. He describes that when someone calls you from behind, you turn and look at the person who called, and then you respond. Your response differs depending on the caller. If it’s an old friend, you might cheer up and greet. If it’s a policeman, you might get nervous, and if the caller is with a knife, you run.

Children, too, perform differently in front of their teachers, parents, and friends. And, if parents decide to sit next to them, and observe them, they get conscious. They don’t understand how to respond. For example, a child might be very talkative and naughty in the house. But, in the classroom, she is very quiet, then your presence will confuse her. You might end up pushing her to speak more often in class and reprimand her afterward.

Don’t push them, and don’t coerce them to perform in a certain way. They are still discovering themselves. If you want to help, try other avenues. But, do not mock or scold them for who they are in the class. Just remember- what they do in the class is none of their parent’s business, so set your boundaries. If you think there is a problem, act wisely and maturely. Use the Parent teacher’s meeting to get more information about them.

Don’t Interrupt the Class

Children reported that their parents interfere in the middle of the online class to ask something or to clear some doubt. Had that been a physical classroom, would you enter it without a prior appointment or a request? Such meddling shows that you don’t take the class seriously, don’t respect their privacy, and don’t respect the teacher’s time. Assume that this virtual classroom is the same as their old physical classroom and things will be easy for you. Refrain from doing anything that you wouldn’t ideally do if they were in the physical classroom with four walls and a door.